Frederick Gaylord Crane; goth and Jewish through his mother —

“The first rule of radio psychiatry is, of course, that a father should not eat his son.”

“Leave me!” [Lilith] said. “I was created only to cause sickness to infants. If the infant is male, I have dominion over him for eight days after his birth, and if female, for twenty days.”

– The Alphabet of Sirach

“When Saturn consumes his children it initiates a reversal of their separation, a reinforcement of the subject into the parental organism. The semiotic (the illogic of cannibalism and infanticide) is consumed by the symbolic (father), which in turn means that the symbolic order of the linear bloodline is collapsed.”

And thorns shall come up in its palaces,
Nettles and brambles in its fortresses;
It shall be a habitation of jackals,
A courtyard for ostriches.
The wild beasts of the desert shall also meet with the [c]jackals,
And the wild goat shall bleat to its companion;
Also the Lilith shall rest there,
And find for herself a place of rest.

– Isaiah 34:13-14

“In early seasons he is portrayed as having numerous rather debilitating allergies and being rather inexpert when faced with a number of more or less mundane social situations (as seen in the fourth-season episode “A Lilith Thanksgiving”). He is known to be intelligent, achieving high academic scores, and is accepted to the Marbury Academy, an exclusive Boston private school.

In addition to his intelligence he shares several family traits, including a talent for chess, and his mother’s talent at Machiavellian scheming based on an understanding of behaviorist psychology. He shares both his Uncle Niles’ lack of coordination and his spelling skill, becoming one of the two final contestants on the National Spelling Championship. As he gets older more traits begin to develop. At around seven he develops a crush on Daphne, much to Niles’ jealousy. As he gets older he begins to get somewhat spoiled and surly, and enjoys Frasier's company less and less, prompting Frasier to fear a growing generation gap, particularly when Freddy becomes a goth, but father and son are able to bond over their mutual bad luck with the opposite sex. At the end of the series he is 15 years old.”

“Goya depicts Saturn feasting upon one of his sons. His child's head and part of the left arm have already been consumed. The right arm has probably been eaten too, though it could be folded in front of the body and held in place by Saturn's thumbs. The titan is on the point of taking another bite from the left arm; as he looms from the darkness, his mouth gapes and his eyes bulge widely. The only other brightness in the picture comes from the white flesh, the red blood of the corpse, and the white knuckles of Saturn as he digs his fingers into the back of the body. There is evidence that the picture may have originally portrayed the titan with a partially erect penis, but, if ever present, this addition was lost due to the deterioration of the mural over time or during the transfer to canvas; in the picture today the area around his groin is indistinct. It may even have been overpainted deliberately before the picture was put on public display.”

Something A Lot Of People Don’t Know Is That Frederick Crane And A.J. Soprano Are Dead And In Love And Living In Hell Together

They Play A Lot Of Video Games And Wear Matching Studded Chokers

Carmela Was Very Upset At First Because Frasier “Looks Like A Northern Italian”

It Is No Accident That Frasier Resembles Count Ugolino

“From the fell repast that sinner raised
his mouth, wiping it upon the hair
of the head he had laid waste behind.

Then he began: “Thou wilt that I renew
desperate grief, which wrings my heart, even
at the very thought, before I tell thereof.

But if my words be a seed, that may bear
fruit of infamy to the traitor whom I gnaw,
thou shalt see me speak and weep at once.

I know not who thou art, nor by what mode
thou hast come down here; but, when I hear
thee, in truth thou seemest to me Florentine.

Thou hast to know that I was Count Ugolino,
and this the Archbishop Ruggieri; now I will
tell thee why I am such a neighbour to him…

When I awoke before the dawn, I heard
my sons who were with me, weeping in their
sleep, and asking for bread.

Thou art cruel, if thou dost not grieve already,
thinking what my heart forebode; and if thou
weepest not, at what art thou used to weep?

They were now awake, and the hour coming
near at which our food used to be brought us,
and each was anxious from his dream,

and below I heard the outlet of the horrible
tower locked up: whereat I looked into the
faces of my sons, without uttering a word.

I did not weep: so stony grew I within; they
wept; and my little Anselm said: ‘Thou
lookest so, father, what ails thee?’

But I shed no tear, nor answered all that
day, nor the next night, till another
sun came forth upon the world.

When a small ray was sent into
the doleful prison, and I discerned in their
four faces the aspect of my own,

I bit on both my hands for grief. And they,
thinking that I did it from desire of
eating, of a sudden rose up,

and said: ‘Father, it will give us much less
pain, if thou eat of us: thou put upon us
this miserable flesh, and do thou strip it off.’

Then I calmed myself, so not to make them
more sad; that day and the next all were mute.
Ah, hard earth! why didst thou not open?

When we had come to the fourth day, Gaddo
threw himself stretched out at my feet,
saying: ‘My father! why don't you help me?’

There he died; and as thou seest me, saw
I the three fall one by one, between the fifth
day and the sixth: whence I betook me,

already blind, to groping over each, and for
three days called them, after they were dead;
then fasting had more power than grief.”

When he had said this, with eyes distorted he
seized the wretched skull again with his teeth,
which as a dog's were strong upon the bone.

– Inferno

Frederick Crane and A.J. Soprano Are Both In Hell For Different Reasons But Each Arrived There After Being Murdered By Their Fathers

The Murder Of One’s Own Offspring Is Known As Filicide And Frasier Crane Is Guilty As Hell Of It

Tony Soprano Too

One Thing Frasier Crane And Tony Soprano Have In Common Is A Poor Understanding Of The Goals And Limits Of Therapy

Another Thing Is Rage

Another Thing Is They Hate Their Sons

Another Thing Is They Often Remove Their Shirts, Revealing Blocky Chests, To Express Dominance, Despite Being Thwarted

Tony Soprano And Frasier Crane Will Never Go To Hell Even Though They Should

“Stronger than lover’s love is lover’s hate. Incurable, in each, the wounds they make…Hate is a bottomless cup; I will pour and pour.”

– Euripides, Medea

Frasier Crane: What did you do?

Frederick Crane: We played frisbee. It sucked with all those trees.

Frasier Devouring His Goth Son

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