1. Pelasgians built a city and called it Rome.
1a. The people of Troy fleeing after its downfall were driven to Rome by storms and dropped their anchors in the Tiber, whereupon:
TROJAN WOMAN #1: what is this
TROJAN WOMAN #2: what is this
some kind of fucking ocean
TROJAN WOMAN #3: i absolutely hate this
TROJAN WOMAN #1: it is completely the o…